Welcome to DisABLEd Mummy
If the idea behind DisABLEd Mummy – to show other disabled parents they can be the very best – helps just one mum or dad out there, then it has been a success.
My hopes & dreams for DisABLEd Mummy
Why am I here?
To share my struggles and triumphs as a mummy. to 2 wonderful daughters who did not ask for a disabled parent. To show that it can be done and that’s it’s OK to share when it gets hard.
To celebrate my sense of purpose as a mother when a disabled identity limits so many aspects of life without choice. To be able to show my daughters that whilst my struggles have been very real, they were both my absolute choice and joy in life.
To raise awareness of the lack of support available for disabled parents
To bring together disabled parents for help, advice and support and a social circle of people in similar situations. I would also love to create social support for the children of us disabled parents so that they can know that they are not alone.
My own success is entirely down to my beautiful little family – my husband Kev & our gorgeous daughters, Imogen (affectionately known as Squidge) and Gabrielle (affectionately known as my Baby Too).
You are my whole world and I love you all with all my heart. Thank you for making me who I most wanted to be, giving me purpose and completing my world.
We’ve got this. We’ve got each other.
I always knew I wanted to be a mum, but I’m not sure anything could have prepared me for its struggles, for the barriers thrown up when you are a disabled parent. It is both the best and hardest job in the world. In some ways, this is exactly how it should be, in others, the world makes something so usual, so normal, so much harder than it needs to be.
Through both my pregnancies, I have learnt that as accepted as disabilities may be becoming in society, doctors actually have very little concept of a disabled pregnancy or mother. In the 21st Century, this made me feel very sad and alone in what should have been my most exciting journey ever. Everyone has the right to follow their dreams and motherhood has long been one of mine.
Whilst all the doctors could say they’d apparently overseen pregnant disabled mothers before, my experience of antenatal care was not a positive one either time. It was frustrating, poorly managed and at times, felt as though the universe was laughing at me for thinking I could be a mum. Second time around, as an over-stretched, underfunded NHS faces the COVID-19 pandemic head on, my disabilities have been mislabelled and ignored outright. I have been very much alone and still wish that disabled parents and support services could be in this together.
I have created this space to share my experiences of disability and parenthood now they are my mingled reality. It’s hard, especially as there does not seem to be any professional support out there for disabled parents either before or after baby arrives.
I hope that my experiences can help mums, dads and children alike. Every disability and every child is different and will always affect your life differently, but let’s look to help each other. No-one should have to feel that they are alone.
Please feel free to contact me. I’d love to hear about you, your families and how you manage parenthood and your disabilities.
Information on any resources or support networks you have used would be greatly appreciated as well, so we can all make life with little ones that little bit easier!